I'm Lucy and my husband is Pete. We were married for almost 20 years now and still counting. We've been through a lot of challenges. Most of those were resolved without others knowing it. We believe that since we enter into this kind of commitment, we also vowed to heed over the responsibility of our relationship no matter what. Its a lifetime pledge and nobody could best help us except only the two of us. Unless, if the problem gotten really worse then thats the time we would ask for other people's assistance but its gonna be our last resort since others don't know about other issues we have. They may not be of help about that and it would even make the situation become unmanageable. Then, the problem extends outside the parameter that we never expected. But so far, we never had a conflict that brought our sanity into a test- if I may say that way.
When we got married, it was in our teenage years and people know how young we were. I remember the time when we went to City Hall for the processing of our marriage license. We were both wearing a pair of jeans while back pack bags dangled freely at our left arm. Then, the attendant asked us if who's couple are going to apply for the said license and he was surprised to know that he is already talking to them. Jokingly, he mentioned that we don't look like at our legal age yet. Upon hearing it, we just look at each other and laughed. It was unguarded and funny....... but later when we left the office, a reality has sank in. It is a kind of reality that we been contemplating since we got into such decision... that its too early for us to get married and we were uncertain if we're ready in any of the aspects needed to make our relationship work. All we know was the responsibility that we are carrying over a growing baby and the love that we have with each other. It was an amazing decision that opened our eyes towards a number of life's revelations.
As I look back, I remember the prejudice, shame and disgust by the people around us for these had marked a tremendous scar in the way we look at them. And in return, it also had affected the way we look at ourselves as persons. These mainly stemmed from the frustrations caused by their expections towards us, that we fail their dreams for us for getting married and having a family too early than they expected. That we are unworthy of their love and respect and so it is easy for them to humiliate us and throw sarcasms about our situation. We live in a society where dignity and honor are two essential things in order to look good before other people. It was not easy for us who got the baby first before having a wedlock. At times, we were even robbed about our authority as parents to our son because they believed that their parenting style is better than ours. There were even some who presupposed on how short our love affair would last and we can't stand on the turmoil of marriage for many years to come. And sad to say and a very depressing reality as well that most of them used to be close to us.
Nevertheless, as I come to think of it, there was no other major concern we had in the past but only about those people who made our life more emotionally and psychologically struggling. Yes, we had petty fights and minor arguments over little things but we were happy as a couple even if we don't have something extraordinary which we could brag to the world or any outstanding achievements to prove to anyone. All that we have was each other, our son, our marriage and we felt complete about it. Yes, we crave for essential things in life but it was not a major concern for we believed that we will achieve these things if we will strive harder.
Above all, i already forgiven those people whom both intentionally and unintentionally hurt us and I hope we're forgiven by them too. Life is indeed too short as they say and it's such a waste of time to dwell on negative feelings. How we got started as a couple taught us the lessons we need to learn about marriage, parenthood, life per se and most importantly, as individual persons. These enabled us to withstand any possible obstacles that comes along the way, in a journey that we call life.
though, we may be far away from each other but I cherish every good and not so good memories that we had back here in the Phils… hahahah! such as….the “asaran at pambubully” ” dahil mas matangos ilong nyo kaysa sa akin, ingay, tawanan, agawan ng pusa tuwing hating gabi , chizmisan, seryosong usapan, kulitan, inisan, inggitan, galitan, takutan (manong mic2x), pagpapaubaya dahil di nyo ako kaya…hahaha! (malakas ang backup ko), pagkarga nyo sa akin kapag nakakatulog ako sa sala kahit high skul na ako, and ultimately, thanx for just being a brother to me …